July 10, 2023
This is how I’d learn storytelling if I could start over.
Over the past 3 years, I’ve delved into 34 books on storytelling, listened to thousands of stories, and completed 12 storytelling courses. Now, I can tell pretty decent stories (you can check out my TED talk to see me in action). But as I look back, I realize there are so many things I wish I had done differently.
That’s why I’m here to share the five steps I would take to learn storytelling if I could start over. By following these steps, you can avoid the mistakes I made and save yourself countless hours of wasted effort.
Let’s dive right into it!
When I began my storytelling journey, I had this notion of finding the perfect story. You know, the kind that would leave my friends in awe, saying, “You’re such a gifted storyteller, Philipp!”
Disclaimer: That hasn’t happened… yet.
What happened instead? By thinking that I’d have to have the perfect story, I rarely told any stories. Without telling any stories, my storytelIing skills stayed at the same level.
But here’s what I realized: 1) My stories don’t need to be flawless, and 2) I can improve much faster by telling small, imperfect stories.
If I were starting over, I’d challenge myself to share tiny stories every day.
So, where can you find these perfect opportunities? Well, it’s a question we hear constantly:
“How are you?”
Typically, people respond with a generic “Good. How about you?” or a comment on the weather.
Don’t do that.
Instead, respond with a tiny story that reveals something interesting about yourself, something that makes you more human.
Here’s an example.
If someone asked me today, “How are you?” here’s how I would reply:
“I’m good. Yesterday, I experienced a moment of relief. You see, my mom visited me over the weekend. I adore her more than anything in life, but whenever we’re together, I somehow revert back to my grumpy, rebellious teenage self. Anyway, when was the last time you saw your family and how was that for you?”
Do you see what I did there? I shared a short, intriguing story about my recent experience and then asked about theirs.
Now, what kind of stories can you tell? Well, anything more interesting than the weather or traffic. Have you had any fascinating experiences lately? Have you learned a new skill? Has something minor annoyed you?
So, the next time someone asks, “How are you?” respond with a tiny story. It’s a beautiful exercise that builds connections and enhances your storytelling skills. Each day is an opportunity to share these small yet meaningful stories.
If you’d like to explore this technique further, feel free to check out my free Storytelling Masterclass:
When I first started out, I believed that only extraordinary experiences made for interesting stories. Like the time I almost died while climbing in Rio de Janeiro, or when I traveled through Spain with no money, or even those mind-blowing insights from an Ayahuasca journey.
But here’s the truth: You don’t need those kinds of stories to engage people.
The best storytellers know how to find beauty and intrigue in everyday moments.
If I could start over, I would focus on spotting those small, beautiful moments.
How can you do that? Try the “Homework for Life” exercise by Matthew Dicks.
Here’s how it works: At the end of each day, take a moment to ask yourself,
“If I had to tell a story from today, what would it be?”
It doesn’t have to be something huge—just a simple act of kindness, a funny conversation, or even something that annoyed you.
Once you’ve identified that moment, write down:
Now, what’s in it for you?
At first, it might not feel very exciting. Your entries could be as simple as “I enjoyed my breakfast this morning” or “I felt proud after finishing my presentation.”
But don’t worry! In the beginning, it can be challenging because your mind isn’t used to spotting meaningful story-worthy moments.
However, if you stick with it for a few weeks, you’ll notice some amazing changes:
This exercise may be simple, but its impact is incredibly powerful. It unlocks a treasure trove of stories that you may have overlooked before.
When I began my storytelling journey, I had no clue what great storytelling actually looked like.
Whenever I asked people, “Do you know any good storytellers?” I received generic responses like, “Oh, you should check out Steve Jobs or Oprah Winfrey” or “Nike uses stories in their commercials.”
The truth became evident: Even they didn’t have a clear idea.
For weeks, I stumbled in the dark, desperately searching for great storytellers. I wasted hours watching random YouTube videos, feeling lost. But then, I stumbled upon a game-changing resource: The Moth.
The Moth is a story slam where everyday people like you and me can step on stage and share their personal, real, and beautiful stories. It became my go-to source.
I highly recommend checking out their stories on their YouTube channel.
As you watch these stories, ask yourself:
By doing this, you’ll learn what makes a story truly great, allowing you to incorporate those elements into your own storytelling. The Moth is an incredible resource that will inspire you to become a better storyteller.
Becoming a great storyteller requires putting in some serious effort. It means sacrificing your precious free time for a pursuit no one is pushing you to pursue.
Maybe you’re naturally self-motivated, and that’s fantastic. But for me, it was tough. Every week, I would tell myself, “I’ll start working on my stories next week.” I kept procrastinating, week after week, making little progress.
Then, something changed.
I crossed paths with two guys, Lionel and Antonio, who shared my passion for storytelling. After we chatted a little bit, I asked them: “Hey, we all love storytelling. Why not get together and share our stories?”
From that moment on, we started meeting every two weeks, sharing our stories and providing feedback to one another.
Having that dedicated time in my calendar became a tremendous source of motivation. I thought to myself, “I don’t want them to think I’m a lousy storyteller. I need to put in the work.”
That’s when my storytelling skills truly took off.
So here’s my advice for you: Seek out a buddy who wants to embark on this journey with you. It may take asking a few people because not everyone shares the same interest. But keep asking, and eventually, you’ll find someone who resonates with your storytelling aspirations. Once you find that person, schedule regular meetings and start sharing your stories with each other.
Having a storytelling buddy who holds you accountable will catapult your growth as a storyteller.
Throughout the years, I’ve discovered that my most significant growth comes from one simple principle:
“Commit now, figure it out later.”
Let me illustrate this with an example:
In November 2021, I made a spontaneous decision to try stand-up comedy. With zero knowledge about it, I searched for open mic nights in Amsterdam, found one, and signed up as a comedian. I had not read any books or taken any courses. Nothing. But I had the mindset of “I’ll figure it out.”
Three weeks later, I stood before 180 people, delivering my first stand-up comedy routine.
It was the most terrifying moment of my life. My legs trembled uncontrollably throughout the entire set. I wish I could say I absolutely nailed it, but that wasn’t the case. Yet, I wasn’t terrible either. Most importantly, I learned so much. In those three weeks of preparation, I learned more than in an entire year.
Now, looking back at my storytelling journey, I realize that I wish I had set myself a similar ambitious goal.
It could have been:
I encourage you to choose an inspiring goal with a clear timeline. Yes, it may be terrifying, and you may feel clueless about storytelling, but trust me, it’s absolutely worth it.
Commit to that big goal now, and don’t worry about having all the answers. I have complete faith in you. And even if you stumble along the way, well, that will become your best story ever.
That’s it for today. Give it a try. By embracing the steps of telling tiny stories, finding everyday stories, watching great storytelling, collaborating with others, and committing to ambitious goals, you’ll become a master storyteller in no time. So, go ahead, start sharing your stories and experience the power it holds.
Happy storytelling!
P.S. Do you want to accelerate your learning? Then check out our new online course The Power of StorySelling.
Uncover the proven strategies to spot, craft, and enhance your stories, and unleash the storyteller within you!
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